Part 1 of Stage 2

     I’m 31 years old and I have cancer.  More specifically, I have Stage 2 Diffuse Large B-Cell Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma.  I didn’t know it for sure until October 1, 2015; however, looking back, there were signs.  I’d experienced extreme itchiness all over my body- from the bottoms of my feet to the inside of my ears- and hives started appearing about seven weeks prior to my diagnosis.  Later we’d find out that this was a symptom of respiratory distress.  I was given steroids by Patient First and told that if the problem persisted, I might want to see an allergist.  The allergist tested for forty common allergies.  He told me I wasn't having an allergic reaction, but was experiencing “idiopathic hives.”  Essentially this meant that my body was producing histamine for an unknown reason.  Again I was given steroids.  When the steroids wore off, I was told that the hives might last for several months, and then disappear.  They may also come back.  I was frustrated and I was exhausted.

     As I lay awake at night, often after taking a cold shower at 2:30 in the morning, I thought about the character of God and a passage from the gospels.  A man with leprosy “came to [Jesus] and begged him on his knees, ‘if you are willing you can make me clean.’”  Jesus replies that he IS willing, and the man is healed.  (Mark 1:40-41)  I already believed God COULD heal me.  I began to pray that the Lord WOULD heal me... as soon as He was willing.  Yet, as weeks passed, I got the feeling that He wasn’t relieving me for a reason.  Now I know that reason.

     The Lord goes before us at all times.  He never forsakes us.  His timing is perfect.